How to Keep the Marriage Intact and Stronger?

Genesis 2:22-24 NIV

"22 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 23  The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” 24That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh."

The Word of God says, man is united with his wife and they become one flesh but it is sad to know that nowadays divorce rate is getting higher and higher, and it feels like it is becoming common almost everywhere in the world. But pretty sure anyone who plan to marry believes that he or she found Mr. or Mrs. Right. But how is it possible that a lot of married couple end up in divorce or being separated after a year or two?

The answer is Marriage does not only requires one type of love. Marriage requires all types of love to keep the marriage intact and stronger. As mentioned on my first blog about love, love can be divided into four types: "Agape" for Godly love, "Phileo" for friendly love, "Eros" for romantic-passionate love and "Storge" for family love and here are some things to consider:

1. Romance is so important for marriage, but a man cannot just marry a woman because of passionate-attraction, "Eros" or romantic love. What will happen if the romance is gone? Romance can be totally different after 10 to 30 year of marriage they say, more so if all the unwanted fats and wrinkles grow visible. What will you do if you find your spouse less attractive? Will you find a younger one? And if that new one become less attractive as the first, will you consider another? When romantic love is gone what will you hold on to?

 2. That is why friendship within marriage is a must. Knowing that your spouse is also your friend gives extra spice and bond to a marriage. Is your spouse always coming home late because he spends too much time with his friends after work? What do you think he does with his friends that he cannot do with you? Boys are boys and girls are girls but if your spouse spends more time with his other friends than with you, then friendship is not established within the marriage. That is why a couple should have a lot of common interest to share with. Something that you would both be excited to do or talk about together aside from bills and responsibilities that can be totally boring and stressful. Something that your spouse would love to do with you instead of someone else so "Phileo" love can also be present in marriage. So friendship will keep the marriage stronger.

 3.Additionally, spouses must have "Storge" or "the love for the family". This kind of love goes hand and hand with commitment and responsibility which is also a must in a marriage. Most people enter marriage without even thinking of responsibilities. They exchanged "I do's" without even realizing that the words "for richer and for poorer, till death do as part" should really exist. So when the hardship comes they give up. So both couple must have love for the family that they are creating. Do not create a family if you are just going to break it.

4. Lastly and the most essential is the "Agape" or love of God. Marriage fails because it is not sanctified by God. God holds the marriage and keeps it pleasant and unconditional. A famous quote once said, "A family that prays together, stays together". This is so true. If the family prays, it creates a bond that will never be broken. Imagine, your family praying together, your spouse reading the Bible and teaching your kids how to pray. "What a lovely family I have", you can say. God gives peace and assurance of a better future. God will never let your family to be broken, but He will heal every wound and straighten what is crooked. So God will preserve the family. Moreover, you are setting a good example to your kids so when they have their own families, they will definitely would have the same as the one you have created. A family full of love.

Therefore, to keep the marriage stronger, keep all the points above in mind. If you are still single, it will also help you plan for your future marriage and family life. As I have mentioned, all types of love should exist and co-exist to keep the marriage stronger and last a life-time.

SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT:
1. What kind of love is my marriage founded on?
2. Is my spouse also my friend?
3. Is God the center of my marriage?
4. Are all the types of love present in my marriage?
5. What am I doing to keep my marriage stronger?

PRAYER:

Dear God,
       Thank you for this amazing opportunity to be reminded of your words that I am one flesh with my spouse and I have vow to love him/her through think and thin. Please help both of us to keep our marriage stronger. There is nothing more I could ask for than a marriage that is bonded by your love, sustained by friendship, ignited by passion and romance and cherished as a family. Please help us O loving God and show us what you can do. If our faith is weak, let us experience your power that we may believe and abide in you. Thank you Lord, in the precious name of Jesus, I pray. Amen.


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